Ari Kafka, Baseball

Ari Kafka played Baseball for 18 years including at the professional level. towards the end of his career, he became more and more interested in Judaism and ended up leaving his baseball career to move to Israel where he is the clinical director at Amudim Israel. 

Name: Ari Kafka
Hometown: Sharon, MA
Sport: Baseball
Career Duration: 18 years
Level: Professional
Retirement: 2007
Current Occupation: Clinical Director at Amudim Israel
Location: Jerusalem, Israel
Interests: Connecting with my wife and children, learning sacred Jewish texts, cooking/baking, reading psychology-related books, playing basketball and baseball

Where are you from, and when did you start playing baseball?
I grew up in Sharon, MA, about 40 minutes outside Boston. Any sport you can think of, I was trying to play. Baseball wasn’t something I excelled at as a kid; I was more of a basketball and football player. Over the years, I progressed and got more and more into it. I played all over the field, but didn’t start pitching until junior or senior year in high school. That’s when I realized I could take it to the next level and play in college.
 
What was the process for you to play in college? 
Growing up I always asked my coaches if I could pitch, and they would always tell me to go to the outfield. Then my high school coach finally let me pitch when I was a junior. I pitched mostly JV that year, then senior year I had a break out. Interestingly, one of my uncles was a sport agent in the 60s and 70s, and he had a lot of Patriots, Celtics and Red Sox players that were his clients. One of his clients, Dick Raditz - may he rest in peace - was a pitcher for the Red Sox in the 60s. Also known as “The Monster,” he was one of the first closers in baseball. He came to watch me pitch when I was young and saw something in me, met with me a few times, and gave me some private lessons. He was a huge influence and helped me move forward to the college level. I didn’t get recruited, but walked on as a freshman at Quinnipiac University, a small Division I school at the time. He continued to have a role in my development. And Jim Lonborg, who was also a pitcher for the Red Sox in the 60s, introduced me to the mental side of the game.

Can you expand a little more on what you mean by the mental side of the game? 
The mindset of visualization across the board. Breathing and meditation, as well as where to focus your pitches. Also playing the mind game with the batter and how to control the game.
 
Has that carried forward outside of sports? 
Definitely. As I’ve gone into my private practice, it as helped having the tools of how to deal with anxiety, increase performance, and overall being mindful.
 
How was your college experience as a walk on? 
The year before I got there, the team was 5-35. It was not a very good program. The coach I was in contact with before I arrived left, and we got a new coach. There was only two incoming freshman on scholarship that year, and then myself and another walk on. Because of that we got a lot of playing time and experience. My first year ERA (Earned Run Average) was 16, and then 11 my sophomore year. It was pretty pathetic, and not very promising. I struggled a lot, and had hit a low point in my career when we played UConn at home. We were winning the game and I came in to close, and blew it. I couldn’t find the strike zone, was hit hard and we ended up losing the game. After that I reconsidered my commitment to the game and if I wanted to continue. I was the last one in the locker room that day, and there were some tears. But in the end the experience helped me re-dedicate myself to the game and to come back and work harder.
 
What made you continue? 
The love of the game. I also had some conversations with and received encouragement from Raditz and Lonborg. My teammates also picked me up. Another person who was a mentor was my older brother, who was a big believer that positive thoughts create positive action.

So it sounds like the following years were better for you?
Definitely. That summer I played in a very competitive summer league, worked out hard and really worked on my game. When I came back, I was throwing 3-4 MPH harder, I was more consistent, and I was one of the better pitchers on the staff. I was a closer, then a starter got hurt my junior year, so I was then in the starting rotation and helped us make it to the playoffs for the first time in many years. Then we came back my senior year and got our first regular season title, were conference champions, and earned a NCAA birth. It was awesome, especially since when I came on as a freshman they had only won five games the season before.
 
What happened after college?
My junior year I got some interest from some major league teams, and started going to open tryouts. The draft came and went and I wasn’t drafted. I then did a competitive college summer league. That year there was more interest from teams and I knew there was a possibility of getting drafted. A few weeks later, I got a phone call from my mom telling me I was drafted by the Mariners. Dreaming about this as a kid, pitching against a garage with a taped outline of the strike zone, all the years being pushed away and told to go to right field, followed by the opportunity to play in college - I had so many thoughts and emotions in that moment. It was awesome to be able to continue working toward pitching in the major league. I signed and went down to Arizona and started my professional career.
 
Which team did you start with?
I started in Rookie Ball, then stayed in the fall. The next year I played short season, and following year I was released at Spring Training. I then hooked up with an independent league team. I finished off the summer with them. There is a whole back story as well that leads to why I’m sitting here in Jerusalem.

Why were you released?
It wasn’t something where I was performing badly. I thought I was competing and doing well. It’s a numbers game, and especially in baseball there are so many players competing for spots. It wasn’t expected, so it caught me by surprise and I was very emotional about it. So in contemplating what to do next, my brother got me to come to Israel.
 
What was your brother doing in Israel?
When I was a senior in high school, my older brother and mentor was engaged to be married, and he started learning more about Judaism. He became so serious that he went to Israel. He went to school at Yeshiva, which is a university where you are learning a lot of logic and character development through the mystic Jewish texts. From my senior year and on, I would visit him in Israel when I could, and every time I went I learned more and got more into it.
 
So did you go to Israel to study at the Yeshiva as well?
Yes, it was a very intense time. There was maybe 25 other guys, all coming from impressive backgrounds such as Ivy League schools, Wall Street, etc. We would sit and learn all day, with a lot of introspection and learning about yourself. My rabbi there was a former U.S. Cyclist and Ironman athlete, so I immediately connected with him. He helped me transition during that time, because I had the loss of identity. Baseball and sports were my whole life. I used sports as a crutch to build my self esteem - it became me. When I was sitting there thinking about who I was, I was very lost and unsure. He really helped me. He happened to also be getting his masters from Penn in positive psychology at the same time. He was working on a workbook to get to know yourself called “The Greatness Within.” Part of it is to get to know your character, because everyone is different and brings their own strengths to the table. That process and experience was profound and really changed my life. It really helped me make the transition.

Had you officially retired from baseball at that point?
At the time I was still getting phone calls to try out for other teams, so I was still training while I was learning. I was running the hills of Jerusalem, working out in a small weight room, and pitching on a dirt path behind the school to my roommate who used to be a catcher in high school. At the time baseball wasn’t big in the country, so there wasn’t a baseball field where we could go. Right before spring training, I had to figure out what I was going to do about the Sabbath. From Friday night to Saturday night you are supposed to disconnect from the world, and there are Jewish laws about not doing certain work. I talked to the rabbis and explained what baseball is and what it entails, and it was concluded that there were certain things I wouldn’t be allowed to do. So at that time I had to make a decision. Do I continue with something I had been working, training and sacrificing for my whole life; or give it up for something I’ve been dedicated to for five months, something I was learning to love and appreciate, and was helping to build me up separately from sports?
 
What did you decide?
I decided I would try out and see what a team would say after I started pitching for them. But my uncle, who is not religious but knows about the Sabbath, sat me down and asked about my plan. After I told him he said, “No, sorry buddy, you can’t do that. You have to make a decision and stick with it, and tell them before you go down.” I also didn’t want to be deceitful. It was not easy to make that decision, but at the same time, it was a big confidence booster to make Judaism my priority and say, “This is who I am and what I believe in.” That’s when I walked away for real and went back to Israel, and I’ve pretty much been here ever since.
 
What did you do once you returned to Jerusalem?
I finished up at Yeshiva and I got married. I met my wife at her parents house when they provided a Sabbath meal. We now have five kids. My oldest is 10, then 8, 5, 2 and 1 years old. And because of my rabbi’s program and learning about who I was, that’s when I decided to take all my strengths into a career. I chose social work and trying to help people. I got a Master of Social Work after I got married and I’ve been practicing since.
 
Does your background as an athlete and also religious background help in your work?
Definitely. I think the work ethic and dedication, perseverance, and ability to be resilient through hard times that you learn through sports has definitely helped me in all areas - student, father, husband, and counselor. Even getting to know myself in the workbook, I saw a lot of overlap in things I had used in sports or learned from sports that shaped me. That is was pulled me to finding Athletes Soul. It’s a necessity for every athlete to have for their transition. I was lucky that it happened for me naturally. I don’t know where I would be or if I would be doing the same things or have the same life if I hadn’t have had that at that time.
 
What other struggles did you have in the transition?
Physically it was and still is difficult to keep up with a workout schedule and nutrition when it isn’t the focus anymore. The first few years when I was learning at Yeshiva, the nutrition flew out the window because I wasn’t buying my own produce. I tried my hardest, and we petitioned for some healthier meals there. I was able to get some cardio. But after the transition, when your life fills with marriage and children and a profession, things get more hectic and it’s a struggle to maintain health consciousness. It has also been difficult to play baseball in general. It’s picking up a bit here with Little League, and Israel was even supposed to go to the Olympics this year, but I haven’t had a chance to get out there to see. Sometimes smelling the freshly cut grass brings you back. Good thing I’m in a desert so there is not so much of that.
 
What made you want to circle back to wanting to help athletes?
I’m reading a book by Dr. Bob Rotella called “How Champions Think: In Sports and in Life.” He is a renowned sports psychologist and his book has gotten me interested in getting back into sports and helping athletes. I talked to my rabbi mentor, and he asked if I had looked into resources, because it seems like an untapped field - and that’s what brought me to find Athletes Soul. It all started with that book. 
 
Do you have a message for other athletes who may be struggling to balance religious practice and sports?
There is a general assumption that religious observance is limited to specific ritual practices. A specific time and place are allotted in our busy schedules to “serve G-d.” The truth is that we always have the potential to connect ourselves to G-d. In every aspect of our lives, in every single action we do and in every single word we utter, there is potential to connect to G-d by trying to emulate His ways.
 
Balancing religious practice with sports can be a challenge at times. A dilemma will inevitably come to someone and a choice will have to be made. Each individual will have to introspect on what is important and make a value judgement. When this occurred in my life, as important as baseball was up until that time, I made the difficult decision to walk away. I was searching for something greater. I knew a major change was necessary, so I moved to Israel in search of meaning.
 
According to Positive Psychology, the highest level of life, which brings the most happiness, is the meaningful life. The meaningful life is described as connecting to something bigger than yourself, the bigger that thing is, the more meaning you have in your life, the happier you are. For me, Judaism is my guide on how to live a meaningful life.